LANGSTON HUGHES I TOO

Posted in AMERICAN POLITICS 2017, I TOO on 26/09/2017 by Majordomo Pain

I, too, sing America.

I am the darker brother.
They send me to eat in the kitchen
When company comes,
But I laugh,
And eat well,
And grow strong.

Tomorrow,
I’ll be at the table
When company comes.
Nobody’ll dare
Say to me,
“Eat in the kitchen,”
Then.

Besides,
They’ll see how beautiful I am
And be ashamed—

I, too, am America.”

Qu’ul cuda praedex nihil!

Pain
Knight Slayer of Shai’ tan
الافتتاحية من الفتاحات
Majordomo of Hell and Terra’s Skies
Order of the Black Rose of the Empire
Ayatollah of Rham and its Shadow
Fair Judge Executioner of Souls
Quarterer’s Order of the Descending Aorta, 1st Class, with diamonds, rubies, platinum concertina, golden concertina, gilded pancreas, emerald gall bladder, platinum spleen, mesentery and lymph nodes
Lady Gaoler of Dis
Chief Engineer Hellac Power & Light
Womb of Empires
Order of the Superior Vena Cava
先生 立石 上様
Fifth Sea Lord of Hell
Comptroller of the Currency
Chair, Hellac Consumer Products Safety Commission
Oracle of Elections
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Mot. Pict. Arts & Sci.]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Tort]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Fluid Dyn.]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Nuc. Phys.]
Chair, Hellac Commission on Sentient Being Rights
Lady High Justice of the Court of Acts & Merits
Knight Commandrix of the Hellac Gordian Knot of Gold
Knight Commandrix of the Hellac Gordian Knot of Silver
Keeper of the Keys of all the Gates of Hell
Qadi of Hades
Chamberlain Imperial of the Necropontiff of the Universal Fatean Church
Order of the Quartz Heart [Eng.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Journ.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Metaphys.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Philos.]
Countess-Palatine of Sheol
Marquise di Gehenna
Empress Consort
White Rod
President Pro tempore Bax Culdnu
Managing Editor—Breaking News
The Dis Brimstone Daily Pitchfork
49 4 Leviathan 3 AS

WHERE WE HAVE BEEN AND WHERE YOU ARE GOING

Posted in AMERICAN POLITICS 2017, DONALD TRUMP with tags on 26/09/2017 by Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., O.Q.H. [Journ.]

Nearly a year has passed since the election of Donald J. Trump to the highest office in the United States of America and for the most part, this newspaper has remained silent. We have been silent on Robert Mueller’s investigation. We have been silent on the daily tragedies, all self inflicted, within the Trump administration. We were silent on Charlottesville, hurricanes Harvey and Irma and on national anthem protests.

Neither I nor any of my colleagues were silent because we didn’t care. We were silent because we thought you actually did care. Yesterday, while covering politics of our own here in Hell, I received an email from an old friend who implored me to get back on the job of reporting about all matters terrestrial in regard to American politics. The link in the article was written in the Atlantic by Ta-Nehisi Coates entitled, “The First White President.”

In his article, Coats lays out in chapter and verse the ills that have lead to the election of Donald Trump and also takes the Left to task for falling into the trap of needing the white working class for its votes. I could not agree more. The white working class has driven its flag into the soil of America and it is a Confederate battle flag on one side with a Nazi Flag on the other in great part. They have, by their silence decided to ally with forces so dark that they were enemies of the United States over seventy years ago. Vilified for their nature and actions those who were defeated in World War II stand in shame in all of history. Now, in the age of Trumpism, the ideology of hate has found a new and powerful home–the Oval Office.

Never, and I as a citizen of Hell’s largest city and seat of royal power I know the real meaning of never, have I seen anything like the events taking place in America today. And still, I recognize the Devil when I see him. I was a Jew while alive and I am a Jew in the Afterlife and nothing can change my view of this world or the world of my past. I know that Donald Trump is nothing more than an opportunist. I also know that nothing is more dangerous as a leader of the free world than an opportunist.


In Hindsight

There isn’t anything sexy I can place here in the space reserved for my snarky take on American politics because those days are over. Black America, Transgender America, Jewish America, Female America Gay America, Lesbian America, Thinking America, all of you are under attack and are engaged for a fight for your very lives. I felt this Trump presidency was a funny lark for the first three months. Then the next three months passed and I was disgusted. Now I am angry and afraid for you. America is beyond being in crisis because white America’s crisis, a major recession and a black president has passed. Trumpists now want the revenge that Coats describes in his article; they seek to not only undo the measures taken by President Obama to make the nation a better place to live and work in, he wants to erase Obama from the history and hearts of the American people by punishing those whom he helped. At the end of the day, I am back and I will be here to write about the horror that is every day of a life of an American citizen under the Trump dictatorship. I would say keep the faith, but faith won’t help at this point. Suffice it to say that I pray that as few as possible lives are lost during Trump’s reign of stupidity, evil and bigotry.

Qu’ul cuda praedex nihil!

Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., CS, O.Q.H [Journ.]
Managing Editor—Research
The Dis Brimstone-Daily Pitchfork
49 4 Leviathan 3 AS

A MESSAGE TO ALL THE MAGA FREAKS OUT THERE IN THE FLYOVER PLACES: THIS IS TRUMP’S IDEA OF POLITICAL FOREPLAY YOU REALLY HAVEN’T BEEN FUCKED YET

Posted in DONALD TRUMP on 29/03/2017 by Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., O.Q.H. [Journ.]

I’m having some trouble this morning working on a title for this post so I decided just to start writing and let the title come to me. I must admit without the slightest bit of guilt that watching this first two months of the Trump Administration’s performance of political amateur hour has given me nothing but hours and hours of pleasure. More times than I care to count I’ve said in the past that the American government is not suited to be run as a business yet Trump, a businessman, won by catering to the bigotries, feeding the fear and stoking the anger of a part of the American electorate least deserving of being heard– white middle class idiots who do not live in cities and that will believe anything that fits into their narrow worldview.

I woke up about an hour or so ago and was reading an article written by Pamela Geller at Breitbart.com which tried to make points for why Trump is failing. The article is trash for the most part but from time to time in the piece Geller crawls out of the bubble and breathes an atmosphere at least similar to that of someone whose sole purpose isn’t to be a Jewish version of a member of the SS hell bent on destroying all Muslims. Geller writes, “So what happened? Trump has to take control. Take a page from Obama and clean house. With regard to Obamacare, Trump should take decisive action to salvage the situation now. He should call every GOP congressman into his office and just hammer out a deal.

Here’s the thing: he talks about being a great negotiator, and that may be true. But throughout his career until now, he has been negotiating not with politicians, but with businessmen. We know their motive: profit. Money.

It’s not the same with politicians. Politics is a twisted world, in which power and reelection are the currency in which they trade. The bottom line in business is money, and while money talks for politicians also, the bottom line with these corrupt clowns is not always so easy to discern.

She’s right for once; Trump isn’t a politicians and he is so out of his depth that he doesn’t even realize it. Is there still time for Trump to salvage his one term in office? Sure. Will he change his tactics and become a nimble politician who can work with Democrats and establishment Republicans to get things that need to be done done for all Americans? No.


In Hindsight

Donald Trump never had the personality or the toughness to be President of the United States. Trump is failing at a game he never thought he could win and isn’t fit to play-politics, and he is too stubborn and addicted to his own bluster to realize it. Donald Trump is bad for America and cancerous to anyone who ever called themselves a conservative. The Trump Administration literally has a month and a half to right the ship and string together three victories, just simple things that show you’ve got a strong hand on the tiller, or it will be too late for him to even stay in office until the 2018 midterms. Being thin skinned was the cardinal sin of one Richard Milhous Nixon and all of you reading this know how that turned out in 1974. I ask you MAGA freaks out there who will read this to go through the comments of Geller’s article and imagine just for a second that this were 2009 and Barack Obama’s administration less than a month short of 100 days into their first term were struggling with connections to say the Saudi government who may have aided the 44th President in getting elected through illegal means? Sure Progressives would have fiercely rallied to their President’s side as we did when the entire birth certificate thing became a thing. But think about how sick we would be in the depths of our souls knowing that their could have been a grain of truth in a scandal that might mean the President had foreign help to steal the election? What sort of person can pivot away from “The President is a Muslim!” to “Make America Great Again, even if that means committing treason to win?

Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., CS, O.Q.H [Journ.]
Managing Editor—Research
The Dis Brimstone-Daily Pitchfork
218 3 Leviathan 3 AS

HENAGAR DRIVE IN CENSORS DISNEY

Posted in CONSERVATIVE BIGOTRY, CONSERVATIVE COWARDICE, CONSERVATIVE DESPERATION, CONSERVATIVE FEAR, CONSERVATIVE IDIOT OF THE DAY, CONSERVATIVE IGNORANCE, CONSERVATIVES ARE OLD AND DYING AND SCARED on 04/03/2017 by Diane Valencen, D.S.V.J., O.Q.H [Journ.], ArF J., M.F.

diane_tomlinson_2

In a not too shocking move the Henagar Drive-In located in a northeast Alabama town comprised of over 2,000 mostly white Souls has cited “Christian” values in deciding not to show the Disney movie Beauty and The Beast. This decision stems from the potential that the live action musical may contain a gay character. On Facebook the theater stated, “If we can not take our 11-year-old granddaughter and 8-year-old grandson to see a movie we have no business watching it. If I can’t sit through a movie with God or Jesus sitting by me then we have no business showing it. We are first and foremost Christians. We will not compromise on what the Bible teaches. We will continue to show family-oriented films so you can feel free to come watch wholesome movies without worrying about sex, nudity, homosexuality and foul language.”

Expect to see more emboldened “Christians” seeking to tell others what they can and cannot watch in the coming months. One commenter Ann Siebert Tiece commented on the Facebook post, “Ty ty ty for your convictions. We MUST stand against evil if we are followers of Jesus Christ.” This woman is yet another in a long line of delusional conservative who feel the only way to live is the way they have chosen. I feel sorry for her and for the people who will miss this movie because of bigotry.

Qu’ul cuda praedex nihil!

Diane Valencen, D.S.V.J., CS, O.Q.H [Journ.], ArF J., M.F.
Editorial Page Editor
The Dis Brimstone Daily Pitchfork
192 3 Leviathan 3 AS

TRUMP’S RACIAL NATIONALISM NOW HAS A FACE: MEET ADAM PURINTON

Posted in TRUMPIST VIOLENCE on 24/02/2017 by Diane Valencen, D.S.V.J., O.Q.H [Journ.], ArF J., M.F.

diane_tomlinson_2

Trump supporters this morning will no doubt being churning out column meters of “black crime” statistics in an attempt to tamp down the vicious attack in Olathe, Kansas against two engineers from India.

adam-purinton

Wednesday night at around 19h 15m CST a white man identified as Adam Purinton walked up to Srinivas Kuchibhotla, 32 and Alok Madasani, 32 and told them to “get out of my country” before firing at least four shots. A bystander who heroically lunged at Purinton, Iain Grillot was also wounded. Kuchibholta died of his wounds at a local hospital and Madasani is in critical condition. Purinton who fled on foot was found 5 hours later in a restaurant in Clinton, MO seeking to hide out after telling a bartender he’d “killed two Middle Eastern men.” India is in southwest Asia. And so the reward of all of Trump’s calls to violence is finally in the hands of his pitiful broken supporters. I pray this is one awful isolated incident but I fear that there are thousands upon thousands of bitter Adam Purintons out there in the flyover states spoiling to take their turn at evil.

Purinton is being held in lieu of US$ 2 000 000 bond.

Qu’ul cuda praedex nihil!

Diane Valencen, D.S.V.J., CS, O.Q.H [Journ.], ArF J., M.F.
Editorial Page Editor
The Dis Brimstone Daily Pitchfork
184 3 Leviathan 3 AS

REAGAN THE MODERATE WARNS ALL OF THE AFTERLIFE AND THE LIVING ABOUT TRUMPISM

Posted in AMERICA 2017 on 24/02/2017 by Majordomo Pain

29596-as_davinci_would_have_seen_pain

Speaking upon the hex in the Bax Demvolu Comnu (the People’s House) Ronald Reagan railed against the wave of Trumpism from Pressju Hellac:

“All the facts of the real world have to be fitted to the Procrustean bed of Trump and Bannon,” he explained. “If the facts don’t happen to fit the ideology, the facts are chopped off and discarded. I consider this to be the complete opposite to principled conservatism. When a conservative states that the free market is the best mechanism ever devised by the mind of man to meet material needs, he is merely stating what a careful examination of the real world has told him is the truth. When a conservative says that bigotry and abject racial nationalism are the absolute enemy of human freedom, he is not theorizing. He is reporting the ugly reality captured so unforgettably in American history.”

Qu’ul cuda praedex nihil!

Pain
Knight Slayer of Shai’ tan
الافتتاحية من الفتاحات
Majordomo of Hell and Terra’s Skies
Order of the Black Rose of the Empire
Ayatollah of Rham and its Shadow
Fair Judge Executioner of Souls
Quarterer’s Order of the Descending Aorta, 1st Class, with diamonds, rubies, platinum concertina, golden concertina, gilded pancreas, emerald gall bladder, platinum spleen, mesentery and lymph nodes
Lady Gaoler of Dis
Chief Engineer Hellac Power & Light
Womb of Empires
Order of the Superior Vena Cava
先生 立石 上様
Fifth Sea Lord of Hell
Comptroller of the Currency
Chair, Hellac Consumer Products Safety Commission
Oracle of Elections
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Mot. Pict. Arts & Sci.]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Tort]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Fluid Dyn.]
Order of the Obsidian Heart [Nuc. Phys.]
Chair, Hellac Commission on Sentient Being Rights
Lady High Justice of the Court of Acts & Merits
Knight Commandrix of the Hellac Gordian Knot of Gold
Knight Commandrix of the Hellac Gordian Knot of Silver
Keeper of the Keys of all the Gates of Hell
Qadi of Hades
Chamberlain Imperial of the Necropontiff of the Universal Fatean Church
Order of the Quartz Heart [Eng.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Journ.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Metaphys.]
Order of the Quartz Heart [Philos.]
Countess-Palatine of Sheol
Marquise di Gehenna
Empress Consort
White Rod
President Pro tempore Bax Culdnu
Managing Editor—Breaking News
The Dis Brimstone Daily Pitchfork
184 3 Leviathan 3 AS

13,506 MARINES APPLIED FOR THE WHITE HOUSE DETAIL

Posted in AMERICA'S UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH THE MILITARY, DONALD TRUMP, MACKENZIE DAVIS, THE SKY IS FALLING on 24/02/2017 by Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., O.Q.H. [Journ.]

fredschwartz1

The title of this post is unproven yet but my staff and I are working on it. Even members of the military former and current are having a bit of trouble with this one. I was in the military in Vietnam when I was alive and back then it didn’t matter who the President was if they wanted to keep you in the shit you didn’t like them. Things have changed significantly in the past fifty years or so and now ideological politics as a deeply held belief is a form of combat all its own. Take for example the meme that’s been traveling around the Internet terrestrially for the past 22 hours or so. This meme states, in an effort to show how much support he United States Marine Corps has for Donald Trump, a conservative view of a dislike for a former President Barack Obama. Like he cares at this point.

Once again to put this into context I’ll have to use a popular culture reference that many of you may be unfamiliar with. I was introduced, just yesterday, to an animated Netflix show called “Bojack Horseman”. The show tells the story of a down on his luck actor who happens to be half man and half horse. Bojack is the surly type of has been who soothes his pain at the prospect of his waning popularity with alcohol and casual sex. The real point of all of this is that Bojack is a touchstone for and a mirror upon modern American culture. In the last episode I watched Bojack goes to the grocery store and finds himself confronted with apple muffins sitting among produce and picks them up. A seal (yes the anthropomorphic kind) comes out of the store’s bathroom and says he has “dibs” on the muffins and just set them there to go relieve himself. Bojack takes offense and an argument ensues. Not really wanting the muffins in the forst place, Bojack simply does what many Americans would do in this situation– he defaults to being a dick.

It turns out that the seal is a naval office named Neal McBeal, a captain in the US Navy and an Afghanistan veteran just back home from deployment. Yes, dear readers it gets better from here. Appearing on MSNBSea ( get it?) with an anchor whale voiced by the guru of television hubric projection Keith Olbermann, Captain McBeal relates the story of the muffin stealing and Horseman’s blatant disregard for “dibs.” Bojack, against all advice he is given by his agent and the ghost writer of his tell all book, calls into the station and basically says that well all of the troops aren’t heroes some of them are jerks. A firestorm of epic media proportions ensues. Watch the scene below.

Now back to the meme giving the drug addled and the angry and the bigoted yet another meaningless warm fuzzy this warm morning here in Hell. There isn’t any way I can say this any better than Bojack did. I served in the US military and I know that every one who has served has sacrificed something if nothing but their time and freedom. But to simply bow at the feet of every member of the US military and grovel constantly about how much conservative “support” them means nothing at all. If these people really wanted to support their men and women past and present they would demand, as I did of President Obama, that the broken VA system be fixed and that every homeless veteran on the streets of the so-called greatest nation on Terra be washed, clothed, fed and sheltered at the expense of those bloated overpaid hooligans in the United States Congress.

melania-trump
In Hindsight

Melania Trump as the First Lady might have inspired a few thousand Marines to prefer 8th & I over Camp Leatherneck but even if every Marine had applied to stand at attention when Marine 1 landed and salute the Donald it would be once again at the risk of over using the word meaningless. Just this past week a Marine colonel who was relieved of duty waived an Article 32 hearing having been accused of raping a minor girl. There is on example of not being a hero among many because “The Troops” come from “The People.” These are the same people who were misguided, stupid, high or drunk enough to vote for a man who has no political experience whatsoever. This flies in the face of the literal pounds of digital data vomited at Progressives that then Senator Barack Obama didn’t have enough experience to be commander-in-chief. By comparison with the blunder and bluster of Trump, the first month of Obama’s presidency seems like a calm afternoon on the beaches of San Junipero with Mackenzie Davis. I cannot stress enough that this White House, and the people that so desperately wanted a victory over a man who will never run for another elected office, is a cancer on the buttocks of freedom, justice and equality on the planet in which you live. It may not happen today, it may not happen tomorrow but in time a crisis will come and the Trump White House will fail to rise to the occasion and Human Beings will sadly pay with their lives.

Pax Terra!

Fredrick Schwartz, D.S.V.J., CS, O.Q.H [Journ.]
Managing Editor—Research
The Dis Brimstone-Daily Pitchfork
184 3 Leviathan 3 AS

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